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The Jacobsen Report

Craig L. Jacobsen

Allow me to humbly introduce myself as Craig L. Jacobsen, son of Audrey Lee O’Connell of New Castle, New Hampshire and Craig Leslie Jacobsen, Sr. of The Beach, New Hampshire. I was advised that what I am disclosing is unorthodox for a pen pal site and will alienate most. Readers who might potentially respond – let’s prove them wrong! I was born on October 23, 1970, in the United States within the state of New Hampshire, city of Portsmouth. My astrological sign is a Libra. I am a Caucasian male of Norwegian European descent. My height is 5 feet 11 inches or 182cm, with short light brown hair and an extremely fair complexion (blemish free) with large light brown eyes (vision 20/10). I weigh 170 pounds or 80 kilos. I have normal features that are anatomically well proportioned. 36” waist; 30” length leg; 18 ½” neck; 32” length arms; XXL shirt; 11 EEE foot. I was born with an intelligence I/Q scaled at 128 (1981) as well as a high emotional I/Q (2016) I am absent of genetic abnormalities or defects to include mental and personality disorders (some contend otherwise). Additionally, I have never been exposed to a sexually transmitted disease or contagious pathogen, such as tuberculosis or hepatitis. I have no tattoos or body piercings. I practice good dental and oral hygiene. I exercise (2-3 hours) daily for an extended healthy life expectancy. Equally important, I have never experimented with an illicit substance or recreational drug to include tobacco products. I have on occasion consumed small amounts of alcohol (wine) and caffeine (coffee / tea).

Additionally, I desire to communicate and develop an intense and passionate relationship with you. Please, challenge me mentally, physically, and spiritually to establish a strong relationship. Furthermore, I have an engaging personality with a strong sense of humor, but without the elements of vulgarity or crassness – I quote from American female comedian Sarah Silverman frequently and this will furthermore be demonstrated tacitly and rhetorically, of course!! Accordingly, when our genetics are easily expressed together, our progeny will be incredible!! Equally important, I consider myself a deviant during the process of procreation and any coitus that is not considered within the same socially acceptable boundaries is emphatically accepted by me!! Hard!!! To grasp!!! – My aberrant concept of humor is sexually motivated and henceforth applied!!!

Next, my employment history includes the technology sector where I was subcontracted to Varian, Cypress Semi-Conductor, United Technologies and multiple national labs (Livermore, Brookhaven, Oakridge). I briefly studied the restricted arcane science of magnetics (hint – it is no longer theory – dimensional science – the ability to bend /travel space/parallels magnetic containment fields/ photonics.) My hero was the former Canadian physicist Dr. Cameron, PhD of Montreal Quebec, Canada. Also, I owned four commercial stores named ‘Spycraft’ located in three western states (California – San Francisco, Beach Street; Nevada – Las Vegas, Maryland Parkway; Arizona – Mesa, Southern; Phoenix, Camelback Road) by the age of 25. The store concept and merchandise theme was generally spy equipment (surveillance, countersurveillance, new military surplus, self-protection) that encompassed a wide array of products to domestic and foreign governments, corporations, and the whole crazy spectrum of the general public. This industry is tightly regulated by Customs, State Department, and United Nations.

I have traveled (commercially) extensively worldwide and I have explored all but one of fifty states that comprise this great nation. Indeed, I know how to create wealth competently and legally without gimmicks while having the wanted socioeconomic status in my upscale community – it is hard work that I enjoy!!! I will be damned if I do not achieve the apexes of my multiple realistic personal goals. In fact, I am an eager person who is self-deprecating and I am desperate for the right person – maybe you? Furthermore, I want to challenge you physically and exchange emotional, spiritual, and mental support. I have been divorced once and do not want a repeated go around. Truly, I have learned quickly from the consequences of my poor judgment within the legal and criminal arena. In addition, I do not have a learning disability (emphasized). Further, I hope that you have developed psychological strategies that allows awareness and acceptance of a person, such as myself, who has the stigma of a felony conviction(s) and all that it entails For instance, are you that woman close to age 30 or more? I would enjoy engaging in further social intercourse (psychiatric term otherwise implied).

I know behind a successful man is a successful woman who supports, coaches, and can tango with her man – are you that woman for me? Moreover, I have graduated with multiple certificates that I had been taught on how to reconstruct my criminal mind and now I have learned valuable ethics, morals, and social skills that have made me aware of the social dynamics involved and how to apply these values and maintain myself within socially acceptable norms. Further, I have developed an abhorrence to my criminal thinking patterns and the utter destruction, chaos, and pain I brought to my victims, my family, and society. The stark reality is actions speak louder than words. I have now grown up and I understand the big picture of what is expected in life within society.

I emphasize to myself the great deterrent for me not to reoffend is that if I “break the law” I will return to prison for life!!! Accordingly, all Caucasian, Asian, Hispanic / Latin or any and all ethnic groups and races of women or an individual (men included) who believe they can influence the direction of my future please, contact me without hesitation at www.securustech.net or www. Azcorrections.gov . You can also contact me at: craig.jacobsen.5@outlook.com. Most important, I am motivated to alter the status quo of my life with your potential friendship (men / women) and / or companionship (woman). I desire a meaningful relationship with someone who can hopefully identify with my priorities, realistic goals, and high values of my moral compass that guide me!!!

Extracurricular Activities – Hobbies – Interests: